I've been thinking about the posts that I've made here and kept private.  These are mainly about Mum's illness.  There is some about that on my other blog too, but most of it I kept here, and kept it as private posts.  I'm thinking that now Mum has died that I'll edit the posts to remove any traceable names, and gradually make them public. 

Just maybe something I've said will prove useful to someone out there.  It took us so long to find out Mum had dementia, and I think things would have been much easier if we'd been alerted sooner.  In some cases "medical confidentiality" is just plain wrong.

7.30 am had phone call from Mum, "the pain is very bad" and would we go over to let her doctor in.  John was still out swimming, so I told her he would ring her back.

Which he did.  He told her he couldn't come as he had to go to work. "Why can't Margaret come over?"  You'd think after 15 years she might have got the message, but obviously not.    Then it was "you could drop her here on your way to work".  I don't think so.  I couldn't do anything to help anyway, and am still getting over the travelling over there yesterday.  There wasn't time anyway, even if I could have done it

Had a phone call around lunchtime from Dr W, one of Mum's GPs. He is concerned that Mum isn't managing very well with the pain following her fall last Thursday.  She needs more help. So he's suggesting she is assessed at Arrowe Park Hospital, and then sent for rehab (probably to Clatterbridge where Dad was I imagine) where there will be physios who can help get her better mobile etc.

To be honest I felt he was being critical of me.  I explained that we couldn't help more as John is in full time work and I am disabled myself.  And I also told him that she had refused all help offered by Social Services when she was assessed following Dad's hospital admittal.

I'm b*d if I'm going to let her GPs think we're just not bothered and not helping, it just isn't true.  We're helping in the only ways we can.  But it's not what Mum wants, and she won't take the help she *can* get.

Dr W said it would take at least a couple of hours to get her to AP hospital and booked in etc, so thought if we called late afternoon we should be able to find out what's going on.  He thought they might keep her there overnight to assess what she needs, and then move her to a rehabilitation ward.

I remembered to ask him if Mum had mentioned there being people in the flat.  She had, but he said she is oriented and since I said it had been happening for a while it would be better to get that assessed at the hospital.  Or later.  He said it was only the second time he'd seen her.  I thought that was why they kept patient notes?!  She's never b*y oriented when she rings *me*. She has a gift for appearing to be OK around professionals, let's hope the hospital can see through the act.

I called John at work and he is going to go and visit this evening, and will probably go on over to the flat to make sure it's tidy and properly locked up etc and let OT (lady downstairs) know what's going on. 

We saw Mum yesterday, and she was obviously struggling, but John sorted out soup for her to heat up later (she wouldn't let John heat it through for her), and we rang her at 8 pm to tell her when it was time to take her pills (the talking clock she has is telling the wrong time and we don't know how to reset it).

We also visited Dad in the nursing home (first time I'd been there since we visited to see it back in whenever).  Bit of a shambles as he was in the living room with the TV blaring out so we couldn't hear what he was saying half the time.  Next time we'll ask if we can go to his room so we can talk in more privacy and quiet.  He'd had roast pork for lunch and had enjoyed it.  So not all bad.

Am not that impressed with the nursing home at present.  They seem to just park the inmates in the "living room" (rather dingy room with HUGE TV that is on very loud and has one of the worst pictures I've ever seen - can barely make out the picture for snow).  Of course this was a weekend, but I wonder if there's anything laid on the rest of the week. Suspect nothing Dad interested in or would/could do.

Aaaarrrrgggghhhhh!

It's been sunny and warm today, so have been out in the yard for a bit and freed off space enough to be able to sit at the table.  But the sun was too strong to stay out, and I can't find the parasol.  So came back in and did a load of washing, even managed to get some of it hung up before John got home.  We had beans on toast for tea and he's set off to Arrowe Park.  When he phoned them at about 6pm they told him she'd only arrived about 20 minutes before, and she's on the Medical Assessment Unit. So that's where he's headed first.

May 12th is Florence Nightingale's birthday, and also International ME/CFS Awareness Day.  I wrote an entry for this over at my other blog, Liverpool Leftovers.

Helen and David called over around lunchtime yesterday, and I was so tired I couldn't even think of anything to say to them.  The surveyer came on Wednesday, so they're hoping to hear about that soon.  Selling a house is a scary time!  The sun came out briefly while they were here, so I popped out and took some photos of the flowers that are growing in our front "garden" (about 2 square yards would be a generous estimate of it's size!).

I have no idea what these are, might they be rununculus?



Love that deep, deep red!